2003–10–19

Here today, gone tomorrow

I woke up thinking about the fact that nothing is permanent. We all know this. I suppose I’m thinking about the flow of relationships. I’m apart of a community of people that I will be leaving in three months. If we accept the proposition that nothing lasts, what is the inspiration for creating? Specifically I’m thinking of relationships. I’m not lamenting the impermanence of my relationships, just acknowledging it.

I’ve thought for some time about the erosion of community life into the barren wasteland of shopping malls where anonymous relationships rule… I’ve sought to create community… to be a part of community. Now that I’m seeing it and feel a part of it, I want to leave. My plan is to leave by March 1, 2004 but last night I was thinking I could be gone by February 1 or maybe even January 1. Memphis is no longer home.

Where will I go? What will I do? I don’t know but I do know that what’s most important, at least for now, is that I find a place which is a place of beauty. I think I’ll probably move around for a while, perhaps a few months. I want to see more of this land.

Edit: A few moments after posting I found this post at Wanderlustress in which she quotes a song by Dido:

I always thought that I would love to live by the sea
To travel the world alone and live more simply
I have no idea what’s happened to that dream
Because there’s really nothing left here to stop me
(It’s just a thought, only a thought…)" – Dido, Life for Rent